I'm busy.

And now my complete and in-depth review of Spider-man 3:

...eh

That pretty much sums up my feeling.

See you in 3 months.  Seacrest out!

My recent insomnia reached a new record last night.  I laid my head down at 11:00 and the last thing I remember was rolling over and seeing the numbers 3:40 glaring back at me.  At this point, I began wondering if I could somehow afford to pay a little man to just live in a box in my house and come out every night to give me a good crack on the skull to knock me unconscious…or maybe I could just try using some Tylenol PM first…yeah...right, I’ll try the Tylenol, but if I remain desperate, the little man in a box with a hammer idea will keep looking better and better.

That's all.  I'm tired.

Oh no!!  All is lost!! It’s snowing!!  Let’s shut down everything everywhere!!  Everyone go home.  How can we live like this?!!  Let me ask you this one question.  When did we become a nation of pansies?  We can’t drive around in the snow, we can’t have smoking sections in restaurants, fast food is making us all fat, our kids can’t ride bikes without helmets, the American Idol judges are too mean….whine whine whine boo freakin hoo grow up people.  Anyone who got less than 8 inches of snow in their area today and either stayed home or left work early, needs to hand in their man card.  Unless of course, you’re a woman, then well, that’s just expected….ooh snap, no he didn’t.  Why is everyone freaking out about one snow storm?  If you listened to the news today, you’d think we were all being hit by the perfect storm.  Isn’t it winter?  Aren’t we supposed to get snow?  Isn’t this normal?  At what point in history did we become unable to function in normal winter conditions?  Since when was having one snowstorm in the month of February a national crisis?  WHY CAN NOBODY DRIVE IN SNOW?!?!!!!!  (one...two...calm down…three…four…it’s okay…five…six…not everyone has common sense the way you do…seven…eight…just be patient…nine…)

Side thought:

Have you ever wondered why it’s always the most unintelligent, inarticulate people that get interviewed by local news stations?  I figured out why that is.  It’s because the rest of us all have jobs.  We have more important things to do than stand around on a street corner and mumble our incoherent thoughts into a tv camera. 

Annnnnnnd Cut.  End scene.  Frustration vented.

OHIO STATE LOST!!! OHIO STATE LOST!!!

I actually recorded the end of the game on my DVR. That way, whenever I have a really bad day, I can just go home and watch the end of that game. That will instantly make me happy. In fact, I’m not even a Florida fan and I’m still thinking about buying the dvd of that game because there is nothing more satisfying than seeing Ohio State get completely crushed and humiliated.

I Heart TV

Scrubs and The Office are the two funniest shows on tv. Everyone should be required to watch them. With an honorable mention to My Name is Earl.

I can’t wait for 24 to start again. I need my fix of television crack. I’ve been having really bad 24 withdrawal. It’s getting so bad that this morning, when I walked into work, I actually paused in front of my desk and said "The following takes place between 8:00AM and 5:30PM. Events occur in real time."

Dr. Cox can beat up Dr. House. Doesn’t anybody else realize that the character of House is a blatant ripoff?

That’s almost as bad as the ripoff that is "Grey’s Anatomy". aka. "The Unfunny Scrubs" aka. "The Hospital of Whores" aka. "Didn’t We See this on ER.?" aka. "Somebody please put a bullet in my brain so I don’t have to hear that whiny anorexic voice ever again."

I’ve figured what’s going on in "Lost"! I know the answers to the big conspiracy. I figured it out. You ready for it? I’ve put a lot of thought into this. Here’s the answer........I’m Warning You...Spoilers Ahead........ (whisper) The answer is this..........The writers make it all up as they go along. There is no huge thought out story or conspiracy. It’s just a bunch of weird, shocking stuff built up and compiled from week to week in order to keep you hooked so they get ratings. The writers don’t even know what’s going on. They don’t even know what’s going to happen 8 weeks from now. They’re just as confused as we are. They just throw in something weird or semi-revealing about a character at the end of an episode so that everyone watching will say "wow, that’s crazy, I didn’t know that! Now I have to watch next week." I guarantee you that the answers that finally get revealed years from now when the show ends will be incredibly disappointing to almost everyone. They can’t possibly live up to all of the hype. Lost has what I’ll refer to as the "X-Files syndrome". A never ending series of questions that will ultimately disappoint and won't make any sense in the end anyway.

Is ER ever going to end? It’s been on for about 18 seasons. It’s like the never ending show. That show is invincible.  It's impervious to cancelation.  Yet, the weird thing is that I still can't find anybody that actually watches it.

You know what we need more of? Forensics shows. There aren’t nearly enough of those. That’s a niche that really hasn’t been tapped. I would have thought that a show about investigating crime scenes would really take off, but that’s just me.  I'm also concerned about the lack of cop shows and courtroom dramas.  There is a vault there with lots of original material. 

Exactly how many CSI shows are there now? Each one is the same show in a different city with a different Who song.

Now, join me in a moment of silence for Daybreak, The Nine, Smith, Justice, Vanished, Kidnapped, Runaway, Commander in Chief, Nightstalker, Love Monkey, Invasion, and 3 lbs. We barely knew them.

So, thank you tv for giving me so much to think about and for letting me escape the things in life that are really important for a few hours a week.